Lessons in love are hiding in almost every moment and situation of our life. The question is whether we are ready to take an opportunity to live that moment fully and whether we are going to stay open to receiving a lesson in love that this moment and situation have the potential to teach us.
I've
had one of these situations earlier this week. I woke up feeling a
bit heavy, sluggish and not quite alert. One of those mornings when coffee becomes a basic and essential need rather than just a strategy to meeting some of my needs, such as, for
example: awareness, being present and energy. As I went to the kitchen to
make coffee, my partner, Jerry, offered to
make that coffee for me. I accepted it gladly and went out to the
terrace to enjoy the tranquility of the early morning sun and the many summer smells. I allowed birds to awaken me with their singing.
When
Jerry brought me the coffee I started sipping with pleasure and
decided to read some inspirational text to contribute to my need for
inner peace and self-connection. Most of the short stories I was
reading were about living kindness through action, living from your
heart, making ordinary moments extraordinary through sharing our
humanness and love – inspiring indeed!
A
half hour after my first coffee, Jerry asked whether I would enjoy
another one. Still not fully awakened I was grateful for the offer
and accepted it with both hands. There came the second coffee served
in my favourite cup. I looked at it and even before saying thank you judgmental thoughts such as ''oh the cup is too full'' and ''he has
probably heated too much milk and poured it all in'', started racing
through my mind.
Now
those who know me well, probably even those who met me a few times
only, have realised that coffee, especially in the morning is a
sacred ritual for me. I am very particular (you can even read it as
stuck-up and close minded 
) about what kind of coffee I like, as
well as how I like to take it. It has to be strong, but not bitter. I
am not a fan of dark roast, I prefer beans from Latin and Central
America rather than those from Africa or Asia. It should be served
with hot milk, not just slightly warm, and there should be neither
too much nor too little milk added...
) about what kind of coffee I like, as
well as how I like to take it. It has to be strong, but not bitter. I
am not a fan of dark roast, I prefer beans from Latin and Central
America rather than those from Africa or Asia. It should be served
with hot milk, not just slightly warm, and there should be neither
too much nor too little milk added...
Well,
now, you probably just by reading the above are thinking that if you ever meet me, you'd
never attempt to serve me a cup of coffee. However, Jerry has taken
on that challenge many times and he has learned to make it just the
way I want it. You see, my well-being, even when it takes a quirky form about coffee, has been important enough for him, so that
when he gives me a gift of coffee, (or any other gift for that matter)
he makes it in a way that I can truly experience it as a gift, the
way I like it and enjoy in it fully.
So
here we were with the second cup of coffee in front of me, my
judgements flying through my head, and before I even stopped for a
moment to look at those judgements, I heard myself blurting out ''you
know, you do not have to put all the milk that you have heated in the
coffee!'' Calmly, without any aggression or even offence in his voice
Jerry replied ''before you judge, perhaps, you can hear what I did and
what my intention was.'' He continued by saying he made a batch of
coffee to which he added hot milk, only to realise that the coffee
looked a bit too white, so he proceeded to make another batch of
coffee, which he added to the original in order to make it just the
colour I like and to taste exactly the way I like it. His intention was
to ensure he made me a cup of coffee that would give me joy.
Hearing
this I stopped for a moment, I was able to recognise and laugh at the
irony of the situation. There I was getting inspiration from reading
about love and human kindness, yet failing to recognise and receive it
when it was right in front of me. This was a moment of awareness and
I just allowed my heart to open in the now in this new moment and I allowed
the truth of my humanness to penetrate me. Yes, I wish to live my
life from my heart allowing flow of love and kindness to and from it.
And yes, at the same time, sometimes, I still react from my
conditioned and judgemental mind before I allow my heart to open and
before I give myself the time to act in line with my heart and its
desire to live from love and kindness.
So yes, I have missed the initial gift of love expressed through that cup of
coffee, but I did not need to miss the lesson. By catching myself in the negativity of my reaction, I was
at the point of choosing: On one side I could continue staying closed
and reactive and on the other side I could choose to open myself to
be touched by love and the intention of care and nurturing that my
partner had put into making that cup of coffee. By choosing to open
my heart I have also opened myself to learning from the situation and
receiving a lesson in love.
Sometimes,
actually most of the time, love is hidden in small things, in small
gestures or in a few words, and sometimes like in my case, described
above, it was hidden in a cup of coffee filled to the brim with love.
If
you've liked this article or if you know someone who is interested
in reading about personal development and self-improvement, please
forward this email to them. Let's share and grow from each other's
experience.
